Shawn’s Zombie Silhouette Helps Paint

You all remember when I turned the tables on Jen from Jen and Tonic over at Jen Tours The Minesite?  Jen has this Troublemaker series in which… well… take a look.. http://sipsofjenandtonic.com/2012/05/20/troublemaker-the-saucy-aussie/

So in a new turn of events I’m hijacking her Troublemaker series idea again and I’d like to introduce you to Shawn Sullivan The Zombie.

I first met Shawn over at his blog called TheeUnseen.  His podcasts caught my eyes (see: ears) and I got addicted.  But what conned me over was “My Brain in the AM:” (http://theeunseen.com/2012/03/27/my-brain-in-the-am-2/) … So go check it out for a good laugh.

But to the story at hand, Shawn mention something about Zombie Silhouettes, it was 3 in the morning and I didn’t pay attention and just said “Yeah Sure”.

“Thanks, John.  About midday.” and our communication was terminated.

Wait, what?  What’s midday?

Well apparently he was sending his zombie doppleganger, the sun was in my eyes as this stumbling mess walked towards me, he looked dehydrated and hungry.  So I offered him a beer and some snags from the BBQ.  After he managed to grunt a little, I think his throat was still parched, so I offered a few more beers, and he started to become more coherent, something about brains and food and something…  So after some rare steak and a few more beers he was running after the kids in a game of chase.   I conned him to give me a hand to paint the kids fort, in payment of beers and tucker.

I pulled out the large screwdriver to open the tin of paint and he went all crazy and aggressive murmuring something about “not the head!!”.  I ignored the moment thinking he was having a flashback or something and opened the tin and he seemed to relax.  I handed him the drill with the paint mixer attachment and got him to mix up the paint while I prepped the surface of the kids fort.

We got sorted and I gave ol’ mate a paint brush and had to explain over and over again not to put the bloody thing in his mouth but to paint with the grain of wood in even long strokes.  He eventually got it, but started to worry about the not keeping in the line like he used to before his ‘change’.  I didn’t want to ask but I think his change was a sex change, because the way he walked looked like he hadn’t mastered not getting chafe on his… err… mini brains?

Under the fort we had uneven ground from the kids digging holes the size of craters made from marbles,  so our guest offered to hold it steady.  My son wandered over to have a bit of a yarn and to see how his two contract painters were coming along, all we got was “Missed a spot Daddy…” or “Can I help?” .  Pfft, like we couldn’t do it ourselves kiddo.

The job was done, I offered him a coffee but he drained the blood from the steak tray instead.  You Americans seriously eat weird shit sometimes.  I made some crack about him drinking blood like a vampire and asked why he wasn’t glittering (all in good humor) and the bastard went apeshit!  Throwing stuff around, trying to grab me.

Now, I’m not a bloke who doesn’t allow his kids to beat the hell out of each other with a foam sword or bat and I had a proud moment when my son figured a way to settle this over-reacting doppleganger down…  Seriously, never been more proud.

Thanks for reading this BS yarn and to see more of Shawn’s work, whether story, blog, podcast or artwork check out the following links.

WordPress:

http://theeunseen.com/
http://zombiesilhouettes.com/

FaceBook:

https://www.facebook.com/theeunseen.audeeocast
https://www.facebook.com/ZombieSilhouettes

Happy Belated Birthday Shawn

~ by John the Aussie on September 9, 2012.