Recovering worker (Guest blog)

I was offered the chance to do a guest post for John over @ https://sleepinginsomniacs.wordpress.com/ (Also called Dumb workers) ….. (I shudder at the name!) ……. while he was down in the salt mines somewhere in deepest Siberian Australia. Now because I am a recovering worker and have a mortal fear of slipping, all I could think of doing, was a cut and paste job from my blog. If you also wish to join WA “Worker’s Anonymous” give me a shout (not too loud as my withdrawal doesn’t accept loud sudden noises). Pop in for tea and commiseration, or leave me your address and I will come for “tea” shhhhhh! it’s part of my therapy don’t tell my boss.

This has been planned for my headstone! OK, it will need to be big, but who cares!

John The Aussie

It started out innocently enough. I began to work at parties now and then to loosen up. Inevitably though, one job led to another, and soon I was more than just a social worker.

I began to work alone – “to relax,” I told myself – but I knew it wasn’t true. Working became more and more important to me, and finally I was working all the time.

I began to work on the job. I knew that working and employment don’t mix, but I couldn’t stop myself. I began to avoid friends at lunchtime so I could work. I would return to the office dizzied and confused, asking, “What is it exactly we are doing here?”

Things weren’t going so great at home either. One evening I had turned off the TV and asked my wife about the meaning of life. She got really cross and I ended up sleeping on the couch

I soon had a reputation as a heavy worker. One day the boss called me in. He said, “Johnny, I like you, and it hurts me to say this, but your working has become a real problem. If you don’t stop working on the job, you’ll have to find another job.” I was putting the boss in a bad light, but I couldn’t stop.

I came home early after my conversation with the boss. “Honey, ” I confessed, “I’ve been working…” “I know you’ve been working,” she said, “and I want a divorce!” “But Honey, surely it’s not that serious.” “It is serious,” she said, lower lip quivering. “You work as much as university professors, and they don’t make any money, so if you keep on working we won’t have any money!” “That’s a strange way to look at it,” I said impatiently, and she began to cry. I’d had enough. “I’m going to work,” I snarled as I stomped out the door.

I headed for the office, in the mood for writing memos and adding figures, while listening to a talk show about labour on the radio, I roared into the parking lot and ran up to the big glass doors… they didn’t open. The office was closed. Later, I realized that a Higher Power was looking out for me that night. As I sank to the ground clawing at the unfeeling glass, whimpering for a job, a poster caught my eye. “Friend, is heavy working ruining your life?” it asked. You probably recognize that line. It comes from the standard Worker’s Anonymous poster.

Which is why, I am what I am today: a recovering worker. I never miss a WA meeting. At each meeting we share experiences about how we avoided working since the last meeting.

Life just seemed .. so bland .. without purpose or meaning, somehow, as soon as I stopped working, and avoided work totally, my life found new meaning.

I still have my job, and things are a lot better at home and the office. Now I play games and chat on blogs and facebook all day and I stare for hours at the T.V. in between dozing on the couch and nibbling on chocolate, when I get home. I am so much more at peace with the world.

* Step 1 – I admitted I was powerless over my addiction to work – that my life had become unmanageable

* Step 2 – Came to believe that games and TV could restore me to sanity

* Step 3 – Made a decision to turn on the computer or TV as soon as humanly possible.

* Step 4 – Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of myself

* Step 5 – Admitted to myself and to my wife the exact nature of my wrongs

* Step 6 – Was entirely ready to have laziness replace all these defects of character

* Step 7 – Humbly asked my conscience to remove my shortcomings

* Step 8 – Made a list of all persons I had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all

* Step 9 – Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others

* Step 10 – Continued to take personal inventory and when I was wrong promptly admitted it (But I’m never wrong so this one was easy)

* Step 11 – Sought through meditation to improve my style of lazing around wasting time

* Step 12 – Having had a revelation as the result of these steps, I try to carry this message to other addicts, and to practice these principles in all my affairs

Have you joined Worker’s Anonymous yet?

(originally posted at http://comedyincrisis.wordpress.com/2012/06/22/recovering-worker/)

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~ by Roly on June 23, 2012.

19 Responses to “Recovering worker (Guest blog)”

  1. I still say your a genius… Sign me up mate!!

  2. A profoundly sad comentary on life in modern times. Well done “recovering worker” and congrates to John for inviting you as guest blogger.

    Happy days, gentleman.

    Jamie

  3. I believe I need to sign up to workers anonymous.

  4. Dear Aussie,
    What a smart guy you are.
    Roly is the bomb. Glad you agree.
    🙂
    Lis

  5. Hi, my name’s Gary, and I’m a workaholic.

  6. And I am a writeraholic.

  7. You made some decent points there.

  8. I really enjoyed it to be honest.

  9. I just wanna say thanks for that. It really perked up my day.

  10. Sign me up to WA!

  11. Nice work (pun intended)

  12. I’ve come to confess also. First step right?

  13. I thought this appropriate;

  14. What a great choice for a guest blog!

  15. BAHAHAHAHA

  16. Being on a pension for the last 13 years, I believe I am safe from assuming I work to much. Nicely Done.

Go on, give us a yarn or two, mate.

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