I’m Just a dumb Miner – With Evil Gnome Intentions (NSFW)

So a friend of mine who’ll we will call Mal has a fear of gnomes, and every now and then I like to play on it, ’cause I can.   So without stalling here is the following conversation via Facebook (yeah, yeah I know….)

John  >>> Mal    RUN MAL!!!!!

http://www.littleguyalive.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/GardenGnome2.jpg
 Mal – I keep telling everyone they are evil!

 John – I know!  Lucky the gnomes got to it first…

• Mal  – ‎>.> JOHN!
• John – MAL!

• John – lets play again

• Mal – Don’t make me visit & throw frozen peas at you

  John  http://www.babbagepatch.com/misc/sml_gnome01.jpg
• 
  • Mal  – My husband is hysterically laughing and all he said was “You better hope we never get a garden baby”..
  •  John –  http://nowandgwen.files.wordpress.com/2011/10/evil-gnome.png?w=535

• 

  Mal – You’re so mean! For the love of God make it stop! *fake sobs*
  • John – Never!! – gnomes protect our beautiful gradens…

    John – proof
  • http://www.demotivationalposters.org/image/demotivational-poster/1005/garden-gnomes-gnome-demotivational-poster-1274274499.jpg

• 

  • John– (if) you touch anything in that garden and
    http://rfrpodcast.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/attack-of-the-gnombie.jpg

•  James– Lol. Best thread all week. +1 (This is Mal’s Husband)

•  John – If Mal Gets desperate we can send in the snotgurgles… http://www.joelkimmel.com/uploaded_images/snotgurgle-798479.jpg

  

•  Mal –  Don’t you chime in, the only action you’ll get James is WITH a garden gmore!

• Mal  – Don’t you have anything better to do with your time John.. really? Go ice your balls or something! *sob sob sob*

•  TDG – FARK this is too funny (The Dumbestic Goddess!!)

  John – No james isn’t allowed because
•  http://profile.ak.fbcdn.net/hprofile-ak-ash2/50495_75351431920_6366649_n.jpg
• 

• Mal – I found one too! Just cause it’s funny.. and related to James getting some gnome action..

  Now tell me how to get it in this thread!… okay.. that doesn’t sound quite right..
•  John paste the picture’s link in here
•                  and if it’s the gnomess topless, I was gonna have the face photoshopped….
• 
• Mal –  http://verydemotivational.files.wordpress.com/2010/09/demotivational-posters-garden-gnome-date-rape.jpg
• John – oh your on Iphone arn’t ya?

• Mal – I can just hear Jody laughing from here on the picture I posted.. hehehe

• John – those blimeys wouldn’t get passed my army

   You take one step near my gnomes and http://elecdoll.com/uploadfiles/elecdollcom-1313061912/combat-garden-gnomes_1.jpg
•  

• Mal – Sigh.. James will definitely want those ones..

• John –  he can try…. http://farm7.static.flickr.com/6081/6024759529_c782e14439_z.jpg

  

• John – but they have means of escaping….

  http://myaccidentalmuse.files.wordpress.com/2010/10/bikergnome.jpg
• 
• John – ok ok they are feeling guilty…. http://image.shutterstock.com/display_pic_with_logo/90650/90650,1216925723,2/stock-photo-garden-gnome-15302881.jpg

• 

• John  – and they wanna know if ya wanna date with their stud?? http://www.falsegravity.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/German_garden_gnome.jpg

  

• John – you know… for a bit of… ummm… https://sleepinginsomniacs.files.wordpress.com/2012/01/x-gnomes.jpg?w=300

  

• John – no?? well they said to pass on http://myaccidentalmuse.files.wordpress.com/2010/10/gardengnome.jpg

  

• John – and they are coming for you … http://images.mirror.co.uk/upl/m4/feb2011/9/4/p-image-2-125278674.jpg

• 

  John – But they ask not to look at http://www.howtosurviveagardengnomeattack.com/

• 

  Granted, it was just a small percentage and not some kind of small armada or gnome army. But this news is disturbing nonetheless.

• John –  one last thing…. they screw like http://dummidumbwit.files.wordpress.com/2011/06/garden_gnome_riding_bunny.jpg?w=640

• 

  John –  http://welldoneweldon7.files.wordpress.com/2010/06/the-end-03.jpg

• 

• James – Holy hell. That was win. 🙂

• John – And 11 year ago they said I’d never amount to anything after school.

• Mal  – I wish I could dislike this.

• John –  I wish there was a “FUCK YEAH!” button

John – Yeah… this is getting blogged….

~ by John the Aussie on January 19, 2012.