I’m Just a dumb Miner – whats your excuse? ‘Cause I Need to Get Off.

When I was a young fella, around 14, my father gave me a list of things to get from a hardware store on the way home from school so he could finish of a job on the pool shed.

I caught the bus there and I walked into the hardware store happy as a larikin.  Any kid is happy to help their old man.  I walked straight up to a one of the workers who gladly helped me collect the supplies I needed.

Shoving what I could into my schoolbag & holding the last item, I went back to the bustop where I started chatting to pensioers about whatever they felt like jabbering on about.

As we hopped on the bus I had to stand up to allow an old couple to sit together, ’cause that’s how I was raised, and found there were no other seats available so I just stood there.  Holding onto the roof rail to prevent me from falling, we pulled up at the next stop where a young (bloody hot) young lady stepped on, paid her travels and stepped next to me to hold the vertical stainless steel pole that I was already holding.

After a few giggle from the pensioners and a few stops later, I was close to home. “Excuse me miss, but I need to get off.”

“I BEG YOUR PARDON!”  – apparently it was the wrong choice of words.

“This is my stop, and I need to get off the bus.”

“And?!”  She seemed iratated, there was obviously enough room for me to go around her.

“And you’re holding onto my pole.”

“What makes it your pole?” yeah ok, she was pissed off.

“’cause I bought it.”

The young lady looked at the pole from top to bottom and saw that it wasn’t attached to anything except her and my hand.  “Oh shit, sorry kid” she apologised and let go. A murmor of laughter rose and all I could say was “It could happen to anyone.”

So off I went, trotting on home with the gear readyto tell my father a new yarn about the bus trip I just had.  He got home early that day and gave me a quizzical look when I rocked up. “Where’d ya get all that bud?”

“Shops…”

Laughing at my response he asks me for the list. “Crap, did you get everything on both sides?”

“Yeah, just like you said.” HELL NO! You gave me the orders, I am not taking the blame for… for… umm… what am I in trouble for.

The list on the opposite side was a list of things he needed for work and was to buy the next day for a job in the city somewhere and it needed to be claimed through work on a single receipt.

“You can’t claim all of it anyway?”

“Fuck it, the boss will understand.”

After my father explained it to his boss what happened, the boss laughed so hard and reckoned it was worth the extra $40 for making his day.

~ by John the Aussie on October 11, 2011.